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Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网5 W' ^7 w" w* i/ t8 P/ Xmso-font-kerning:0pt">QQ; K5 i9 o, o7 h4 I# D& {+ `* x
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。2 }# ^1 w! O( k/ {; Z
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾陆英：6 Y9 L: o; g; d3 O$ ]7 t, M: smso-font-kerning:0pt">
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4 C/ d% `6 O) N2 F L6 Xmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第8 W) B0 ?% ~) f
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：' {8 V! a7 E/ G2 N P [& U+ Xmso-font-kerning:0pt">“' u. C' Z6 S8 p; F5 N8 M# X9 j
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。* Q0 v) n, v3 R, x
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：$ ~' z' {9 W( y$ }3 x0 u- M! bmso-font-kerning:0pt">“4 k+ o' _7 Y# v1 u( Q/ Y6 K
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。3 H* z* y, ~ l t& A8 P
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？! R$ l4 p: Q" V. [( R
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1 k# r: G U6 Z4 j- tmso-font-kerning:0pt">子曰：$ k* a' u8 S C9 I+ W) F
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& R2 r% I N1 X: d$ }mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。, C1 i+ v5 b- u* b6 m5 j
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。 p/ C+ ]. i. O- m, T
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：" A- D3 o6 E- o' @; E
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% a9 I. i b* ^, mmso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。" y2 W( E$ [/ ~! h* h5 u1 V" G1 R
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3 }1 U# d2 U% U" M. O0 `7 ]mso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：/ O8 j9 j' }7 x% @; r' O
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" J2 D: d$ m! P) z9 M8 _Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。8 x) Z4 i- m+ |" H" F9 {: K
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5 Y: Y, p7 Z4 x$ y% Hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟说：) T* x5 q& s. D! ]7 W' q8 `
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" J5 n W. d! u$ q" n( Nmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢" H: |/ }+ ~# @" s/ o Mmso-font-kerning:0pt">?" # z2 g& F. ]# ~5 S! ffont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;" @4 }, X" H" V* z. t
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：7 s/ m# M7 J3 N7 ^mso-font-kerning:0pt">"* ^& N( I8 T E# @1 p3 F0 B
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4 D! t! b/ K3 e% _mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。. r! \3 z" x' P1 g
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是& B+ Y1 Z8 R1 ]7 j8 {, F
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_) V) z4 u w. d% Pmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违, [, H. ]" w6 ^3 F10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”8 [* w, I! f) W( C- R+ B" u) Nfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;& P# }9 T; @. R) Z
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) B$ A4 s% k# R; Q0 h: J4 j1 [mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得2 r! n& s9 u9 H% d: w3 C' @
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3 h) d& s7 T& \2 E# U: T2 \mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲- `3 ~7 w1 @* q5 v( W8 \mso-font-kerning:0pt">“4 U9 h7 F4 z1 z) J. Dfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，# N/ e. s K& x* }. Rmso-font-kerning:0pt">“* Z4 Y( d' e& O, K7 l& v4 _font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
& \8 O" V9 V% c/ bmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。4 m( `: m- s! V7 w. I4 v% V, F
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。) i6 M1 m% M, [$ @0 o$ `& Nmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：本章谈孝的重点是，孝要落实到礼上。孔子讲仁与礼的关系，一方面强调仁是礼的核心，礼应当体现仁的精神；另一方面又强调，礼的规定体现了仁的要求，依礼而行就是仁。据此，是否做到了孝，要以是否依礼而行来衡量。% N c; D2 ?( T2 Omso-font-kerning:0pt">
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4 `1 t% x7 y; k c5 {0 `2 i# z0 YTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义 k5 F+ x6 {5 r- ]0 l, I( _5 V$ B' Dmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！- I5 Y4 I) R6 ~9 q8 |
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2 |1 j8 I1 O; c# l! H% R% p5 `mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。: v8 @2 r: D, h- [4 K
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述9 D4 U( Z' p* p$ ]9 imso-font-kerning:0pt">2/ a& _5 j( C9 J4 Z5 @: S" qfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;* }7 u" e: s# f
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊: H9 I( m2 L2 g: L
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。* D; r. v* d2 {0 N% M
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孝经
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; ?* ]( V) J# w1 [3 H2 iTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。# Q z1 v# ~: O! \
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0 p1 G. z$ a# D. O, _mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。 {1 q9 u4 v$ Y3 L
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& A7 u% h! U, ?4 _! w; ^) Rmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：# u1 ^4 p% e& I+ H2 Fmso-font-kerning:0pt">“ S- I0 A+ e2 }font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
6 A: I! }9 Y9 d) P* l* F( hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。( u7 |4 U! E" N. o, J
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\3 F8 ^: D, ^, jmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个1 T; W" f2 S9 t/ c2 i" C+ D
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬: L9 l/ S$ A g7 r) Gmso-font-kerning:0pt">”$ ?7 L# z9 A! A9 p0 ~6 Xfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
- F- R4 i) B6 |mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为2 H+ j/ G, l% b+ ]- ]5 [9 Lmso-font-kerning:0pt">“! s. [8 Y/ C* ofont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;* ?" I( S9 O/ d* {" q: o
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; d0 T4 a% {, a u8 |' W6 z6 amso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。# c) c* w9 V/ \# J7 ]
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的0 m. j# v0 I4 O* e& Ymso-font-kerning:0pt">“$ n: ^9 `5 w5 Y0 n) p% S
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( z$ g6 Y4 G5 Y4 h( |3 l; v- ~9 O$ dmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思7 u6 K) ~/ h2 O/ ?' {
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