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* R, f5 Q' v- P: l/ a0 D( ]) RTahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网2 x9 m: D$ Y. _, Q
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$ G- b% Y0 H* s& }. Q, B5 ?mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。$ G7 Q# H; {# Z+ H
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+ U/ q" F# t& K0 ]5 x" Tmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：3 a, }' D: t9 M7 J0 t" p" ~mso-font-kerning:0pt">“3 M9 S" d4 |9 T+ c6 imso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
9 p& D/ @ v2 s- t+ Qmso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。4 r7 I$ H1 p" d2 V- C$ [mso-font-kerning:0pt">”! P3 k' x0 H- a# hmso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;: l0 l- h$ k" r: P& p: k% w, F
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。$ Z: u: t% n' @" t1 P! Ucolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”! ]% I8 M e* R. I5 r2 kTahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
4 |, D/ K. J$ \3 p# i" y+ ^% \mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟曰：9 d( |+ z9 v" _+ ~, L- Z- xmso-font-kerning:0pt">“0 W$ h: W3 I, t. g. s
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* G6 R, Q4 k7 N8 \: q1 Zmso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？1 Q: L4 B r# ~. [+ A" v# D: }% Gmso-font-kerning:0pt">”8 q. f/ |- n- M2 f6 ?mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;# k! ~. w. d E. H: ?# F( c. G
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2 B: |3 d0 }( P& ] Q1 v, ?mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。% P5 i3 ?2 P9 J: W
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# e, N. [) @& k/ l2 Y1 |; |mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。4 F/ M; s% n( t2 j
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- Q G3 A9 c/ m) Lmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：4 |' j1 K' t# L" _" E. Y5 i
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! k" K2 d' i5 z) T5 Xmso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。) Y4 ?' W( O5 a3 U p, M10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”+ n/ d0 H$ S, r h# b W
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/ a+ X1 h2 `0 Y: Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：; r+ a0 c% y+ |& k
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# P3 ?6 z0 ] V# h" y: O) ~- r- tTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。 V2 x: L) O( x; ]mso-font-kerning:0pt">"7 a% E4 q* t! }% g; @font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
6 r4 J0 i9 h( h7 Q4 s: H9 Dmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟说：7 F' Q* P/ V8 F: a: i# Wmso-font-kerning:0pt">"& O6 Y$ g5 W' O3 ffont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
4 O- R4 e. S) smso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢# T( \. R* W. u: Fmso-font-kerning:0pt">?" , F0 F, E. E0 q/ w' M1 |& m
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：) d1 L6 V) ^8 F& O3 imso-font-kerning:0pt">"3 B- j3 h3 G5 ^+ t
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# ~ ]1 g, Q( k- G8 L' }3 L! B/ s# vmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。# L5 U+ c$ q4 Y7 [# J, z# Mmso-font-kerning:0pt">"
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e# e3 S$ \) V2 }% t$ o# p3 U3 Cmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是% h2 M. a, w( P0 U7 |10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“. a2 }& g" m( N) b Lfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得) N- z ]8 Y# c, b7 N8 {mso-font-kerning:0pt">“0 t2 p+ q) j/ T* J
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, V. m5 ~& ]/ G& K Amso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲( z' [4 X: e) M: f
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，* f' Q: K7 E1 n. y) j9 Jmso-font-kerning:0pt">“& a! |# n3 t' R. Q y
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。( U7 R9 z; r5 \- fmso-font-kerning:0pt">”$ Y/ ~/ b) o X" S+ i4 g. H- efont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
7 l7 |# {, ` c* Wmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。- Q; Y9 ~$ Y M; ?1 F& i0 }mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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6 w! F& }% Q0 I. ]! S emso-font-kerning:0pt">答：本章谈孝的重点是，孝要落实到礼上。孔子讲仁与礼的关系，一方面强调仁是礼的核心，礼应当体现仁的精神；另一方面又强调，礼的规定体现了仁的要求，依礼而行就是仁。据此，是否做到了孝，要以是否依礼而行来衡量。0 s: o9 \5 I0 Qmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义$ L: D6 _" B+ h& b" o! N7 bmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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h9 M8 h h! [* a) XTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！ G5 ?5 H3 |4 d: y7 E! I" g! P m' @* Zmso-font-kerning:0pt">——5 ^! H# Q, `% H6 f) K1 v* ]font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;$ a( i# m, Z+ r
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。! [9 n# Y8 W5 S4 ?9 v& N) d
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$ D) k3 w' L; q% iTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述& t( h6 i/ q" f. o, ^mso-font-kerning:0pt">24 `% L7 X2 A1 P) n. t( W
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊+ N6 e# T% |7 Z
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。7 B2 o$ O2 C, z+ _7 ~5 b, ~; r: {
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孝经
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。; t' w# t( l1 y2 b" xmso-font-kerning:0pt">——; o/ V# i5 `' r: N5 O/ h
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。4 y1 X9 _7 ^& H* Z3 D5 [: M
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：2 T" t: V* ?2 G. nmso-font-kerning:0pt">“ }+ c% `* ~, T0 b0 X* u9 ]
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。0 I8 M, k7 v3 w) s) Y! R: Fmso-font-kerning:0pt">”2 u# |2 l' @& M2 z; ^9 q, r, _
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) ?; H1 Q* d/ W/ ?2 hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个1 _. i! |( _+ I7 O. w! }2 u" V9 imso-font-kerning:0pt">“1 ]* H, b* x, M( Q$ M( u/ tfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
2 d K8 F: |6 \9 S5 d' I* ]. omso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬, Z# l' C. Q: s' g
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为% T, }2 L! X* Smso-font-kerning:0pt">“4 \ f# E& J; G' a9 t5 Y
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">要道, H% B, p% I- W- x' b! jmso-font-kerning:0pt">”* u' Z M3 e, m
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。5 q6 t7 p. w, Q2 u
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4 ~; d3 F5 E- K0 oTahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">舍得：* O9 u' s y# e0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的2 m# J- G! I; X; ]* h2 s
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">顺9 s9 T# m. l2 E1 z% h, Omso-font-kerning:0pt">”7 F. V+ A& a- K9 @9 G6 g+ g2 ?
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思+ g- Z; e o/ `0 E7 m& {
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