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r1 F1 K5 d. P2 I7 _7 f9 WTahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网2 y( U0 F k0 r( n7 z& z
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。4 ? x" N: u) d7 R% y) S
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第" Z$ G+ ?# x# e& Y9 O
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0 f, T; t7 I p2 K6 j4 e6 c) t" ?mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：2 X: J& c4 m- r3 E3 d# [. smso-font-kerning:0pt">“( C5 c/ B; j }* j
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：' Y0 ]9 h" s4 e& U/ m; X6 ymso-font-kerning:0pt">“, b' g" B' O, @* Jmso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
; t: t% n+ u' Jmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。: A) O1 u6 p% [$ p! d7 Y! u" ~ }
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟曰：; I5 _+ b! D, t$ F- [
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( n2 }; j% T& X: k9 U3 ?mso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？+ s o2 A2 |8 C8 s8 ] t$ M
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& x- ?2 Z. W* [. L, ?% i+ K- omso-font-kerning:0pt">子曰：# a }, t( n7 j! T& Lmso-font-kerning:0pt">“ Y, p- O/ t( Z7 v* X" I/ e+ F) X
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" M! N8 Z/ R1 @2 ~9 cmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。9 s) A: I/ E0 R3 s; jmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：4 e, l0 P. d( ~0 w9 k7 P" H3 l10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“7 E+ X& f, v F! @) q" j& `9 V* c/ @mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
! H/ W3 B0 X3 B$ \1 M3 v# kmso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。& }8 H# s/ L8 B+ Y' I6 A* S10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”, w" a: g$ {) V4 J& K0 f9 o4 {mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
: L# r, \. U; A2 O) smso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：4 `, X8 O4 o7 U, R0 l \
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8 q' z9 B- p5 ?6 W1 pTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。* E3 f! H' n/ S* Zmso-font-kerning:0pt">"' F. s7 O( ?% ~( M7 k; O% r2 I
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, i5 T: C8 f3 b. {. x' Dmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢6 p+ I) D% I, e
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：2 j: Y4 w* l, ^, ymso-font-kerning:0pt">" O7 J# O; K9 C2 d# x$ P pfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;2 ?4 u5 o( I4 K0 K& `0 F- t
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。3 z/ ?9 N7 B# T; Gmso-font-kerning:0pt">"
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8 }5 [+ ^) g _+ c* K2 _7 H5 W3 _mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是3 ^/ \+ G1 i( L0 S4 e$ s& G7 U
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( D: h) T$ F% e2 Bmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违! Y7 I; P2 V' I0 n) \3 W" ~: v10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">” `; Z+ X/ S1 \7 u _3 m6 Cfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得/ [2 t Z) s0 @) Q; E( T
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违4 Q$ |2 H# N) m8 r- }( _2 Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">”% _. W% k/ Z4 _- t$ Q' y" Bfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
2 ?9 J' q/ H- fmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲- s& {" [" x2 Amso-font-kerning:0pt">“7 q: x" G, `7 ~& xfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;% a; B6 T, v3 B+ N
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，) P4 t* p) D8 N+ e1 ymso-font-kerning:0pt">“5 O4 l$ S2 J) P/ V7 qfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;3 s1 {4 }, D! @ |9 w, C
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。; X8 m7 x& n; ^+ m6 x, g1 G
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。 i" W& W5 y/ z4 w9 T
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：为什么说以礼事亲才是孝？6 ^! E" j% X/ b' \/ m
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：本章谈孝的重点是，孝要落实到礼上。孔子讲仁与礼的关系，一方面强调仁是礼的核心，礼应当体现仁的精神；另一方面又强调，礼的规定体现了仁的要求，依礼而行就是仁。据此，是否做到了孝，要以是否依礼而行来衡量。. B5 S% H# | `# K' j' qmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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$ u0 V% }9 Y7 d# U3 E- G8 f3 qTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义$ Z' R# ?' i/ w. I7 Z* Z* ?
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$ q7 J8 [! g! t+ s, TTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！, b% j& F( k8 k( J6 @mso-font-kerning:0pt">——. W! o9 h; k( [8 u. k6 ofont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;3 j. Z4 f0 `' H- d- N' P# w" u
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。* }# u, t& h1 ^/ u6 l& n. Y
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: z) {5 c; R$ M# hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊- V4 `" Z% e$ Y
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2 X* l+ E) _" N3 ]4 X4 LTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。- ?1 p! S `: _- Q5 K/ ]: _. L9 s' m
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孝经
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4 j9 ]1 W J5 r+ v1 A, VTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。3 c& v B8 g5 ]! i8 ?mso-font-kerning:0pt">——% r; X- Q: C6 V: N9 i2 E) x( d4 \
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5 {, X- N4 b* B1 a( d' pmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。5 c/ t/ O3 ^* y* H# ?/ Mmso-font-kerning:0pt">——- {8 z, V% d9 M6 Y
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1 Z9 r% C& U2 b1 B& pmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说： }( I* V% E3 R! Y2 T9 l" | H" A
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( k; g* v# N: Bmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。) ?" l% ]2 \" L% i' o7 tmso-font-kerning:0pt">”# q0 O5 [2 }/ d8 H. Efont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;2 i% k1 b3 @& P+ j1 ?6 w
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个; a3 C: f3 r. r
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2 s# q+ g* ?9 C1 a1 j6 @mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬- R% X; f7 L, [, O8 n j f! n5 Gmso-font-kerning:0pt">”1 u7 e, {" q; X+ Gfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;2 W5 K+ k) s$ `, M: u" E
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为& o( K) T* v8 w
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。- w; v9 ?; d1 c9 r& i& L% j
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j1 M, y* F+ h n& f) S0 q8 CTahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">舍得：" C( H: }# a; }1 u. j1 y5 K! V
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的1 F4 M" P2 q# }. O o" y2 Z
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+ O" f4 I4 b' _: I3 a. Rmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思* G3 N S0 L; y Kmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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