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* C3 {! H3 ~' O# ^# tTahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网$ T) n1 Y- b( Y2 g% o2 J1 _mso-font-kerning:0pt">QQ, h( \0 W+ [3 C& O# `4 k
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. R- B0 _+ i+ `$ n. d7 W9 E7 p9 O6 F0 emso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。# f+ C" f' X! X; k
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第: r1 d8 f- [9 I- ~- w2 x% D: m
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：3 t7 ~- p& Y$ T5 h1 x* Q* D
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/ Z2 C' Y* v* t4 zmso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。; M) l; _6 n# p0 Y% t: @1 Amso-font-kerning:0pt">” ^: |$ d$ K; lmso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
9 W5 m2 ], f, j: ], ]8 p( M$ Tmso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰： V& M6 B" O1 N1 n
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& Y6 K \/ Y$ _4 h1 F6 Kmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。5 s$ x+ G: r( `& q% `6 S/ C6 icolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”* K L9 O. N; D7 q
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟曰：" L: p8 V6 j) O& x" x0 m' bmso-font-kerning:0pt">“ z* a. f( @+ E3 Z5 K. v$ v
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？/ I* q2 w1 Y# ^% o+ v# o
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( h& S& T5 n2 I8 Jmso-font-kerning:0pt">子曰：. I+ q, L8 q T$ @/ r
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。0 ?8 b x& L E5 w6 acolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”
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% ~! g4 @" d8 F4 kmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。* o$ u, C" r7 R1 ^7 [& ~mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：' B }) `$ X9 V+ F10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“% Y) U! Z0 b* r! Lmso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
1 S6 `) A- c5 H/ Z" Z! _# Xmso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。- h9 _5 e! q q* _0 P! E, L
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：: w: b# e1 c/ }' }, f0pt">") N1 e4 {0 _, Y( mmso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:
( @# y7 h; f+ }9 Z) m# BTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。" U, H" _2 Q3 j) {8 c
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0 m: I% @$ j; V& E1 t3 t/ Dmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟说：0 L @) V5 K4 y Q, _ j+ {: Q
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4 d4 ~3 K- e) r. }% `mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢& B) H2 D6 C. z( R, O5 c1 V1 `mso-font-kerning:0pt">?" % D3 q8 p$ T" l2 P% b8 T
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：; n: C9 Y4 ]" z6 i) @6 n
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。+ Z/ F% Y& U+ s! b; O2 Qmso-font-kerning:0pt">"
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是! L, W3 j. ~' A. y: o# E10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“; }7 [ Z7 o: h8 f( Z! ?: t7 S
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得2 {/ V- m! B f' K" k- ^# amso-font-kerning:0pt">“" ]6 C+ A- f# Q( a* I+ L0 ufont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
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9 w8 Q) R2 O# P" dmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲2 W7 w0 l5 g' V2 \" u5 l
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. {+ I! A+ I* D- e9 Z4 _- J2 jmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，: C! t9 _$ o/ G1 n$ ~% a6 G: T
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。1 |- V, d9 i+ i% F7 F
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。5 V( b9 ^ R" | _& V ~mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义" R2 j. b3 t7 k& v7 R4 `
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！* O1 r8 h5 g E7 g, [# rmso-font-kerning:0pt">——7 L# O( d+ w- J' d9 R; A2 P7 qfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma; v. q( n/ U6 B' x
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。6 s' E' K: D D: amso-font-kerning:0pt">
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% L0 G- L5 K$ FTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述7 i: F# g9 l: B. K5 ]- M a. Mmso-font-kerning:0pt">24 i8 }) I3 V; a# o" Efont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;* I" @ W g, j. y2 ~) ?
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊- i$ `+ Y7 X$ M( N6 o+ x) w9 R
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5 D* g) Y1 z8 N5 U3 T: A8 A, DTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。& v1 r0 [ q9 T" V" x gmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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孝经
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. b8 O w, R, Q2 g4 nTahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾陆英：" ]$ i- A5 D0 p$ l V0 N0pt">
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7 @& G7 H2 Q; n3 _% ^$ {0 |& uTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。5 N. F# x o. u8 W8 T* p
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2 h k6 ]9 b# k0 L1 U* \0 Z e) kmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。3 D. ?# J- ]' L% ?
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：# w3 q5 @- @& y* n9 @1 z0 @- jmso-font-kerning:0pt">“5 a& L2 Q* O* h
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& r" Q7 o7 i& }0 j( S# Zmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。* X3 b: {0 j2 L3 E, G3 [! w4 _$ H
mso-font-kerning:0pt">”. @8 `; \5 w7 E' b+ Yfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;% A: ]2 ~/ q% q' E* o
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个" B" I B5 ~, c& ~& Ymso-font-kerning:0pt">“( k& J5 B% P) j- t' P2 x1 h# z
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬. y2 z# [% p$ X1 q. ?( m9 wmso-font-kerning:0pt">”" J( O; B& H- ^+ f# _1 \( O; |1 l
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为6 P( G: `" T* y/ e
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. m* F! ^, e& i+ z4 n, E, H0 l" F6 Nmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">要道% f3 k( f2 B! f; U
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。8 W2 U. W1 Z0 r" ?* q2 m
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的5 H. { b ?7 L! r7 T- [
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">顺! o+ p2 ~0 s1 H8 x" t% U
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' B5 Q, C0 c& {+ p, m3 i+ v2 nmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思( b0 q" |' Y; L# _3 Qmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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