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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。. W$ H1 G0 F1 h5 b. N) ?* W4 l
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7 ]' P' d2 c d8 e! hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第+ N, A/ U( J5 f; f& y$ jmso-font-kerning:0pt">52 L! P, n& n, k# h8 z; Bfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;$ B2 z: [. ^5 I' a+ E+ q: G5 Q" [
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' Y5 s. t6 {, g* V( y. U$ C8 ]mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：% m V6 G! F2 d$ y$ u
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：/ F: N) y1 G% X2 M
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; {" I& ^ w8 Jmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。* ~1 T3 ~1 [1 ~8 ^: B- Ycolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”- Y& ^! K! r( g) p+ _+ }1 u5 xTahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
# ^0 E4 T$ z/ w/ zmso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟曰：0 p, _ T; ^) o9 _0 c: V% }mso-font-kerning:0pt">“% \6 k; ?: x9 d
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, ~9 a d# M7 q Vmso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？+ J/ t" _7 H5 `, x
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; d: a! ~2 w8 G- Xmso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。/ t2 z4 J" Y- @. l v) w
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) H. k" ~& v" B, R& J3 r- \/ r3 Imso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。3 ^* B- {5 t N' J7 P/ N# a
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：& e0 m9 U6 H: x6 ^7 F( b, y10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“4 f4 V7 i2 a( F2 ?( a6 A1 y* X/ z
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9 f. m' |! i" z* k& ~mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。4 I1 Z1 J, a+ z! U1 Y10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">” k1 u* N7 m) D( U3 b, O, L4 ~
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：6 |6 G! [7 I1 \0pt">"9 U- E1 t+ {, o& f) ~ [mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:, ?7 _. M7 i( V. J0 ]2 m+ G3 f
Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。! V4 V/ D$ ?* Z) Qmso-font-kerning:0pt">"( u* ~+ J! q- p1 I. [% ?font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;! Y4 b3 T! L* [% q
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟说：4 P9 ~6 v: K" X! j X: { ^: L$ O, jmso-font-kerning:0pt">": A" N6 ^1 T3 A: I8 \
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢( H# l8 ~# z8 |$ |9 g
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$ m* [ B8 k% |# umso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：$ y1 m, x% O/ i" G2 }: Xmso-font-kerning:0pt">"0 p# O5 m L9 L0 V, T
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。3 I- W) k" `; Y3 w+ M1 Amso-font-kerning:0pt">"
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是: |' K$ @( p* ]& H3 J! ~
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违5 P. [+ ]" }% r/ t10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”& J$ `7 j* j* p; ]1 w6 a/ K7 Ofont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;% s: b' w: t( W5 F4 C s1 M
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得$ \7 l7 K' u) j/ }1 \
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8 _& O2 G8 L9 Z- |+ t) Lmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲5 N( l- D( N5 Omso-font-kerning:0pt">“2 K9 f$ i3 n! z8 Vfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;0 \3 r9 K g& n4 m! j+ d8 d
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* H; r% @3 F# \5 Emso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，5 T; C9 n3 F* T2 t! v. ?" N2 F
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! s+ d* b; j8 S! G* v2 Mmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。( n" E% y. X- lmso-font-kerning:0pt">”6 D! B9 o- j( x# s& l0 A, z" @* G& W
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0 i7 n0 L# \6 \8 Hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。8 n0 _+ U5 @! bmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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! M7 T. W4 m9 O% v4 fmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：为什么说以礼事亲才是孝？& D$ ?: f7 `* `/ D10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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8 j* q# o' q- }& A3 w. @mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：本章谈孝的重点是，孝要落实到礼上。孔子讲仁与礼的关系，一方面强调仁是礼的核心，礼应当体现仁的精神；另一方面又强调，礼的规定体现了仁的要求，依礼而行就是仁。据此，是否做到了孝，要以是否依礼而行来衡量。# G# A9 i \5 m' e. _/ E" \" I2 q# O
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">小风飕飕地：7 {- n! |* Z2 p! |! N4 {7 s
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, y, F6 u; U3 c1 v- RTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义0 A: [ l4 A! [2 z- mmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！1 S6 ?. Z. K% u0 r. A W& J1 T
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3 B+ K1 q' Z0 p0 J' h' bmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。+ G" w5 z6 Q0 B3 G0 \# M& Bmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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1 X; x" y9 F3 g7 ^4 b- LTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述( X3 ~( s$ f1 }) c3 _) [( S' B
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊" X" \; H! p! X6 C' C
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" r( l: m4 u1 g0 HTahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">乃群：" k* E6 Q3 r' x+ [( z
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。/ S/ |4 ~! r/ L& z& |7 Pmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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孝经
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。7 j6 ^) @$ b9 z/ Omso-font-kerning:0pt">——" ?& t5 J- `. Lfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
6 i& j- {* ]/ ^. zmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。% B% }3 F" ?2 b" P
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( V+ ] L7 I+ n/ q3 Z) Xmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：) M4 B8 n u5 G. U% B" V( T
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。. b* t! s" K/ Kmso-font-kerning:0pt">”) p; w/ L X# C
font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;1 |! g9 }, O0 Q6 {8 o& V
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个+ ]. O5 o7 A6 w# b& K9 ^, G
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬; a7 g. D$ t" E( @! k# U. Z( n
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为9 u' {( @8 N" o2 Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">“* P0 e m6 L9 a
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">要道: R+ i( D' U1 fmso-font-kerning:0pt">”& B. ?9 j/ F& j# B
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。6 L; z" y' |( n" F. C( v+ rmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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( M$ e* Y, c% I- K2 Z4 M; I3 sTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的! ` s" y: [# X
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思7 l7 y+ O$ _* D
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